German Bratwurst do's and don'ts

     On my way home from Europe earlier this month, I had a one hour layover at Frankfurt airport.  I was hungry when I walked off the plane, so I immediately went searching for food.  Right outside the gate, I looked up and to my great joy saw a German sausage stand.  I thought that would be perfect to have a sausage and a beer in Germany, since I was technically in Germany, so I bought this one pictured above.  I know it generally looks strange and comical to Americans to see a dog served up in this way, with a bun that seems much too small for the size of the dog.  We are used to our buns being the same size as the weiner.  The Swedes serve their "korvs" as the Germans do, but with a longer, thinner sausage, and an even more meager bun.  It really looks cartoonish.  But both forms suited me just fine coming off of a long flight.  So after buying the above sausage, a went to the ketchup dispenser and pressed down its pump, thinking that the ketchup stream would be slow and easy.  

     To my utter dismay, the ketchup shot out like water from a garden hose set on jet, and splattered all over my hand as well as on the dog.  Unacceptable.  Totally unacceptable, I thought.  Why in the world would you need that kind of pressure for dispensing ketchup?  I turned on my heels and walked to the nearest seat, shaking my head and really questioning the legendary German rationality praised by philosophers of old.  I sat down and commenced eating my bludgeoned dog.  After a few bites (in which I took in all dog and no bread, mind you), I looked over to my left and noticed a woman sitting and eating the same kind of sausage.  She looked calm, reserved, and respectably dressed.  I believe she was German.  I watched her eat her dog.  In one hand, wrapped in a napkin, she held just the sausage, and in the other hand she held just the bread.  On a plate before her I saw a serving of ketchup and a serving of mustard.  She first dipped the end of her sausage into the ketchup followed by the mustard, bit into it, then lifted the bread up and bit into that.  Dual hand usage.  All very neat and clean.  All utterly rational.